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From a very young age I held heavy in my heart a deathly fear of anything which exited the body. Of course, there were the traditional exports which all children had listed in their heads in order of ascending grossness, including but not limited to: spit, snot, boogers, vomit, earwax, chewed food, eye boogers, poop, wee, farts, sometimes including toenails. So it was with utter disgust I witnessed my mother and her boyfriend kiss, what officially began as 'good-bye' kisses, progressed into 'hello' kisses, and soon became 'I-feel-like-kissing' kisses.

By this point I should have come to realize that gross things can only lead to more gross things, as my mother's hateful acts resulted in a baby, who exhibited the very height of my fears; upon exiting the womb- the very first sign of her apparently incurable disease or nastiness- began vomiting and pooping and weeing  and not even able to take proper care of her messes. As a result I now know 3 facts: anything that comes out of the body has no chance of retribution, gross acts lead to gross results, and it is impolite to stare in horror when people sneeze.
True story. I say 'ew' on impulse when people sneeze instead of 'bless you'.

Opinions, corrections, suggestions. Anything. Thanks for reading :)

This is a contest entry.

*EDIT* My lovely sister sabotaged this piece and deleted it when we had an argument. Sorry for the re-upload. But it was an excuse to re-write!
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leyghan Featured By Owner Sep 27, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
Featured [link] :)
emode Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2010
Why, thank you!

Good feature, btw. Neat stuff ;)
leyghan Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
Welcome. :)
DailyLitDeviations Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2010
Your wonderful literary work has been chosen to be featured by DLD (Daily Literature Deviations) in a news article that can be found here [link] Be sure to check out the other artists featured and show your support by :+fav:ing the News Article.

Keep writing and keep creating.
emode Featured By Owner Aug 8, 2010
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Submitted on
July 28, 2010
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